The shared bits

First Lines: Blood Honor

Written by matt on February 12, 2007 — 3 Comments

Ragar’s rebellion began when he sheathed his sword in his father’s sleeping form.

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3 Comments to “First Lines: Blood Honor”

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  1. Valerie's Gravatar Valerie
    February 13, 2007 at 6:41 pm | Permalink

    Uuu, like the subtext behind this one. It does seem to need an additional descriptor after ‘father’. Maybe fathers body, or fathers ……?

    Val

  2. matt's Gravatar matt
    February 13, 2007 at 9:02 pm | Permalink

    Good point, Val. I agree that it felt like it was missing something but I wasn’t quite sure what or what to do about it. I made a minor edit and now it’s much better.

  3. Valerie's Gravatar Valerie
    February 14, 2007 at 7:16 pm | Permalink

    Amazing what that little change did. Now that is a good first line.

    Val

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