The Wrong Kind of Examination of Conscience
Virtually every time I finish some sort of prolonged interaction with a person or people who are not members of my immediate family, I find myself combing over the occasion to point out any and all social fais pas or awkward things I said or did. I then proceed to feel extremely embarrassed and sometimes even guilty about them and stew over them for longer than seems wise, completely blowing them out of all proportion. I’m not exactly the greatest person at the whole social interaction thing, and while examining the stupid things I do when being around others can be useful in trying to make sure I don’t do them again (and I don’t tend to make the same mistake more than once or twice), it still seems a little ridiculous. I’m at least not so mortified over things like this that I lose sleep over it or let it virtually paralyze me with fear and embarrassment like it used to do (thank goodness!!) but still…
I think one of the biggest reasons I commit these social fais pas is because I’m not always as attentive as I should be during social occasions. I tend to always have at least a little bit of secondary thought going on that really shouldn’t be there, which makes my conversation reflexes a little slower and awkward than they should be at times. It also makes me put my foot in my mouth upon occasion. I’m doing a lot better about it in general, but there are times… I don’t know if part of this stems from the whole introvert thing or what but I’m tired of it!
Please tell me I’m not the only one who does this, ok? 
[edited to fix spelling - oops]
bearing on 30 Jun 2007 at 5:52 am #
Gee, I find it a lot easier to blame my own social problems on probably falling somewhere on the Asperger’s spectrum. That way I don’t have to try to change.
You already commented on my post on this subject.
Have you seen Jonathan Rauch’s piece Caring for your Introvert?
Jennifer F. on 01 Jul 2007 at 9:12 am #
Oh my gosh, I could have written every word of this. This is my life. Unfortunately I don’t know well enough to stay away from polite society, so there are many train wreck stories involving my interactions with others. And it also stems from not being attentive enough. You are definitely not the only one!
amber on 02 Jul 2007 at 7:46 am #
Thanks for commenting! And yes, I did see that Caring for your Introvert piece, wasn’t that great?!?
allegra on 05 Jul 2007 at 7:38 pm #
You are definitely not the only one who has this… challenge. I’ve always thought I have a major disconnect between my brain and mouth–and it’s bilingual. I can read and write in German much better than I can speak it. At least I am such a poor speaker I don’t put my foot in my mouth abroad.