Rutabaga Dreams

I don’t think I mentioned it here (only on the house blog), but the kids and I have been visiting my parents since late Sunday night.  We’re heading back this morning, and while I’m looking forward to seeing my dear husband again, I can’t say I’m particularly looking forward to going back otherwise.  As much as I try to maintain perspective and all, well, it is hard to live this life, harder than what I am used to.  In the tents it was much more of an adventure than it feels like now.

When I was here I not only got to visit with my parents and enjoy their spacious house, I also went to my old book group and to the homeschool park day we used to go to every week.  Most of the regulars were there, and it was great to see them all…  but it also made me realize how much I miss them!   I’ve never been very good at making friends or finding a community, and I think this is the first time I’ve really done so since college.  I’m sure I’ll get there in our new home, but the whole stumbling around, trying to figure out how to do it part is always rather tiresome and  frustrating.

Well, time to keep loading up the car so we can get on the road.  If anyone has any tips on how to find friends, I’d love to hear them. 

I have always been rather suspicious about the supposed benefits of monopolies - public or private ones - but our experiences with building has really shown just how ridiculous and frustrating they are.  In a monopoly, there is no need or requirement (other than a PR one, which only seems to hold true for advertisements, not real life interactions with customers) to actually do anything for one’s customers.  Status updates?  Time estimates?  Eh, why bother.  We’ll get around to it whenever we decide to do it, so long as you don’t ask too often and annoy us.  In that case we’ll stick you at the bottom of the pile and pigs will fly before we get to your application.

Matt and I have really been amazed by this when dealing with the county and with PG&E.  We filed for a permit and power at about the same time in June, and with both entities no one will return your phone call, no one will give you any sort of estimate, and no one particularly wants to talk to you.  Then we contrast this with the propane company, who will show up in three days with a propane tank, and send out someone to talk to you about your future tank placement and piping needs.  When we’re ready for the bigger tank and piping, they’ll be there in no time at all to install it and get it all ready for us.  Need some tractor work done?  How about two weeks from now - I’m really busy at this time of year, but I’ll try to get there sooner if I can.  Concrete poured?  Sure, next week is great, we’ll be there first thing in the morning.  Granted, PG&E has a lot more infrastructure issues than any of these guys, but still, all they need to do is review our plans, ok a 500′ trench, let us dig it and lay some pipe, approve it, then pull some wire.  And for this service, which we will wait months and months for, we will be charged thousands and thousands of dollars.  *sigh*  It is enough to make me start wondering if we should take those thousands of dollars and buy some solar panels and batteries.

I had another post all written up, but I’m opting not to publish it.  It was rather whiny and petulant, and while it ended on a fairly decent note, I’m fairly certain it was not worth reading.  Suffice to say that living in a 23′ trailer with no indoor plumbing and limited power is not the greatest experience in the world, particularly when it is cold and rainy.  However, the experience has encouraged me to think a lot about my sense of entitlement, and how much we create our own suffering because of what we think we should have or be able to do, or because of the deadlines and situations we place ourselves.

For example, why should it be an expectation that I should get to take a shower every day or every couple of days?  The vast majority of humanity, especially over the timespan that humans have been around, never had that expectation.  Why should I expect to have clean, tidy, and non-stained clothes (and lots of them!) at the drop of a hat?  Why should I expect to have acres of counter space, a nice spacious oven with an accurate temperature control, and a refrigerator that doesn’t have to be reset several times a day?  Most of the world does without these things, and many have probably never even seen such luxuries…  what is it that makes me so special that I deserve these things, and can justify getting grumpy and frustrated when I don’t have them for what should be only a short period in my otherwise middle-class American life?  All I can point to is the luck or accident (or fate, I suppose, depending on one’s perspective) of my birth into a fairly  middle-class American family.
At the same time, I have to keep myself in check a bit, because it is easy to move from thinking about what other people lack to pitying them for lacking these “essentials”.  Because if I go too far into that, it can almost start sounding like the only way to live a good life is to have running water, a warm, spacious, cozy home and easily accessible, easy to use laundry facilities.  At that point, I’m about as ridiculous as some billionaire socialite who can’t imagine how all the little people live without an army of servants, a summer home, and a private jet.  Certainly, some of these things might improve one’s quality of life (whatever that means, exactly) but they certainly come at a cost (and not just a financial one) as well.

So, at this point I feel rather unsettled.  I feel grateful when it rains that I have a metal roof over my head rather than canvas and a tarp, but I still get easily frustrated at the lack of space and the general dirtiness in the trailer.  When we wake up in the morning and find that it is 44 degrees in the trailer (and 32 outside), I’m very grateful that we can kick on the heater and bring the temperature up quickly to something a bit less bone-chilling.  However, I am still very tempted to throw things off the counter when I yet again run out of counter space while I’m making a nice, warm, and healthy dinner for my family (and thank God that I can do that for my family!).  So, there are a lot of contradictions, and a lot of challenges, but a lot of blessings too.  And really, isn’t that the story of our lives here on Earth?

Since I posted last, we’ve had about an inch and a half to two inches of rain, four or five visits from a momma bear and her cub, and we’ve moved into our trailer. Are all these things connected? Well, the first two items certainly helped encourage the third!

The first bear visit was on the 22nd, at about 6:30 p.m. We were coming home from visiting Matt’s mom because it had rained all day, and we were greeted at the parking pad by a wet and anxious dog. Jos is usually pretty mellow, so Matt quickly followed her down to camp and discovered that we had been raided. We think that we scared them off when we got there, because there was still dog food on the ground and other edibles available. They got into the cooler without damaging it, but ate all the cheese, leftover spaghetti and tore open several other bags. They also ate some excellent apples I had bought the day before. I think I was most irritated about that! Well, that and having to quickly pick up and shlep all of our food up to the cars and the trailer (still up on the well road at this point) before it got too dark to see anything… As I was picking up the dog food, Jos started barking and I heard a loud scurrying sound right near me. I looked up and she had just treed the bear cub. I quickly grabbed the dog and Gregory and headed back up to the tent area, calling Matt. Emma was still up at the tent area because she was rather terrified by the whole thing, and we watched Matt scare off the bears while I held Jos by the collar, Gregory in my arms, and had Emma clinging to my leg. The bears finally wandered off again (the cub just does not get the hint - the mother bear had to charge the cub a couple of times before he finally gave up and followed her. That cub is going to be a problem!) Emma hid under the picnic table while I packed the food, but by the time everything was up in the cars and trailer and we were getting ready for bed, she seemed fine. Matt had to scare them off again that night, and they came back on Monday night and early Thursday morning last week. As far as we know, they haven’t been back, and they haven’t gotten anything since that first night. Matt’s truck had bear paw marks on it on Wednesday, but they haven’t made any attempts at the cars or the trailer. We’re hoping they are not as determined as Yosemite bears and they’ll leave the vehicles alone. Ah, the joys of country living!

On Monday the 24th, a friend helped Matt move the trailer down to the parking pad. They got it leveled and set up, and on Thursday we had a RV repair guy come out to check everything out before firing all the systems up. It seemed like a good idea since the trailer is about 20 years old and has been sitting unused for about 2 years. He found that a board needed to be replaced on the fridge, but otherwise it was in good shape. He replaced the board and now we have a functional refrigerator! You have no idea how great it is to have a refrigerator again. I have always known they were nifty things and all, but now that I’ve had to deal with a cooler (and the ice and the water and the mess…) for two months I really appreciate just how amazing and wonderful they are. I don’t have to worry about things falling to the bottom and getting squished and waterlogged! I don’t have to do emergency runs to town for more ice because it mysteriously melted overnight! Ah, life is good. We also have a working oven and a stovetop with 4 burners, which has been great. Sure, it is small, and I have almost no counterspace at all, but it is really nice to bake in an oven again. Everyone is adjusting to living in 224 sq. ft. of living space very well, although I rather resent having to vacuum and clean floors again. It was nice when we were in camp to spill something, kick some wood chips over it, and then continue on my way. Now there is upolstery to deal with again, and floors to be cleaned. Oh well, there are pluses and minuses to everything.

Otherwise, things are going very well. The weather has settled out a bit, so we’ve been able to do more outside again. Yesterday I put in a flight of steps down one of the hillsides so that it was easier to get to the porta-potty and the house pad. We also planted some garlic in the garden and I think we’re very close to being able to harvest some spinach, kale, and lettuce. This week I’m hoping to get a third bed put into the garden, but I need to do some chainsaw work to make that happen. (Yes, I know how to wield a chainsaw now - yay me!) I don’t use the chainsaw without Matt around, so perhaps that will wait until the weekend.

Well, we are about to head off to Faith & Fellowship at church in a bit. They do a neat thing here - they provide a free dinner for everyone, then all the kids go off their ways and the adults have their own presentation. I’ve been going up with Emma to help out with the K-5 group (they have them all together for the main presentation, then break apart to tables for about 20 min of age appropriate discussion, then come back for wrap-up and closing prayer) but still I think it is a really neat way of structuring everything. Emma has been in the pre-K/K group which is way too easy for her, but she’s going to try the 1-3rd group tonight and we’ll see how that goes. Observing this brings home some of the limitations of classroom education, but it is nice to have someone else planning something and it gives me things I can work with Emma on during the week (another reason to be there with her!)

OK, now I’m really done!